I wouldn’t consider myself an expert at very many things. I mean, I’m pretty good at making puns, and I’m pretty skilled at eating a whole bag of M&M’s in one go, but we all have our limits sometimes. One thing I can say for certain that I’m an expert at is being single.
This month marks two years of my single-dom. And before that? A little over 18 1/2 years of life. In today’s age, it kind of makes me feel like a unicorn. I mean, there are people I went to HIGH SCHOOL with who are already getting married, and I’m only 21! It seems like every time I log into Facebook I see someone else getting engaged. Meanwhile, I’m drinking wine and googling “minimum age to be on the bachelor/bachelorette” (p.s. the minimum age is 21! bachelor mansion, here i come!).
All jokes aside, the single life isn’t all that bad. I mean, you don’t have to share food, no one judges you when you sing off key to One Direction songs (except for friends), and you don’t have to put your life on hold for anyone!
Wow, that last bit made me sound kind of witchy, huh? Well, too bad, because that’s the main premise of this blog post! So if you are hopelessly in love 20-something, you probably won’t be able to relate to this post. Enjoy!
Learn how to love yourself
First thing’s first, walk up to your mirror/pull out your iPhone front-facing camera and say the following to your reflection: You are strong. You are beautiful. You are worth loving.
That last part is really key. Just because you’re single doesn’t mean you aren’t worth loving, so go out there and TREAT YOSELF! Give yourself all the things that you want, within parameters of course. If you can’t afford a 6 month European vacation, you probably shouldn’t go on one. Here are some slightly more affordable alternatives that can still give you a fuzzy feeling:
- Get a mani/pedi
- Hang out with your gal pals
- Work out or do yoga. Get that blood pumping!
- Go on a week-long European vacation (much less expensive!)
Try to ignore society’s pressures
So WHAT if your mom’s friend’s niece is getting married at 22 years old when you can’t even get a guy to text you back? So WHAT if your last single friend got herself a boyfriend, making you the designated odd wheel to any group outing? You are a strong independent woman who don’t need no man.
You have to come to terms that you are a magical human living among mere mortals, and you have to wait until you find your perfect magical human counterpart. Until then, rock the single life, girlfriend! Tell society to frick off!
Get off those crazy dating apps
Swipe left on Tinder, Bumble, and whatever other dating app you use. 98% of the guys who use those are douche canoes and you deserve better than that! I know, dating in 2017 is hard. How do you meet people? Ed Sheeran said (sang?) it best: “The club isn’t the best place to find a lover, so the bar is where I go.” While I would argue that the bar isn’t the best place either, the point is that you can’t force a relationship. The best relationships are one that spark from a chance encounter or some other rom-com crap I guess.
The point is, Tinder is not the place to go if you want a long-lasting relationship. Let’s just leave it at that.
Take any opportunity given to you
The best part about being single is not having to plan around other people. I mean, sure, you might want to stay in your home-state to be close to your family, but at least you won’t have to stay there just to be close to your high school boyfriend! If you’re single, you can take any job offer at any corner of the world without looking back. You can travel anywhere without toting extra baggage (get it? baggage? travel?).
Honestly, just carry on as usual
The single life isn’t some sort of disease that will plague you for eternity. It’s just a state you’re currently in! I promise you that if you carry on as you usually do, things will work out in your favor. You will be happy, you will be healthy, and some day love will find you. You just have to be patient.
Do any other ladies have advice for living the single life? Leave them in the comments for me (and other strong, independent women) to find!
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